3 Qualities to Embrace During the Full Moon
Embrace and embody your natural, powerful, feminine spirit
Don’t forget about the Free Full Moon Yoga Class coming up this Thursday, January 27, 2024. Register and get all the details below!
The Full Moon and the lunar cycle are deeply interconnected. The Full Moon aligns with ovulation in the menstrual cycle, which represents the full strength and power of the feminine spirit. Ovulation and the Full Moon are associated with the qualities of generosity, abundance, sexuality, and play. During the ovulation phase of your own menstrual cycle, or during the Full Moon if you’re no longer menstruating, embrace these qualities in your personal practice and daily life.
Generosity
Generosity is one of the Yamas, a yogic code of conduct codified by Patanjali in the Yoga Sutra for living in relationship with others, and is most commonly translated as “non-stealing” (in Sanskrit asteya). When you’re influenced by the Full Moon or the hormonal fluctuations of ovulation you may feel a surge of energy and the urge to express it. I prefer thinking about asteya as generosity rather than non-stealing because it’s easier to actively practice giving to others (and yourself) than it is to abstain from taking. When your cup is full and your energy is balanced and aligned, there is no need to steal. When your energy is abundant the best thing you can do is share it with others. In yoga, and in life, giving is meant to be selfless. Even the side-effect of feeling good is not meant to be a motivating factor. You give and share because it is the right thing to do, because it meets the needs of others, and because it is a natural extension of your spiritual connectedness. Unfortunately, modern women often don’t have enough in their tank to give.
The time of the Full Moon/ovulation is a time to consciously practice giving freely in honor of the principle of generosity. However, it requires that you adequately rest during menstruation/the New Moon to regain the energy needed for generous gestures. And don’t forget to be generous to yourself too! Loving and treating yourself is absolutely necessary before you can fully, truly love, treat, and serve others. Oxygen mask on first, mama. Then help your kids.
Here’s an excerpt from an old article I wrote on the principle of generosity (if you struggle with connecting to generosity in your life there’s a free guided meditation for cultivating generosity at the end of that article).
The thing about generosity is that to authentically give you have to feel content, secure, and confident in your Self. And that’s where the challenge lies. Too many of us don’t feel comfortable enough with who we are, how much we know, our own self-worth, or our financial situation. Instead of going out into the world to share and give what we have, we hide.
It’s easier to give when you feel like you have something to give. If you feel like you are lacking energy, time, knowledge, money, or resources it will be harder to show up to give when you’re running on low (or empty). Therefore, practicing generosity requires a mindset shift. To truly live up to the principle of generosity, you must feel abundant and worthy in your own right. You can’t just volunteer once a year or donate a little here or there, although that’s a great start. To embody generosity you have to first embody abundance.
That brings us to abundance! My favorite principle to hate. It can feel so hard to tap into this quality, especially because, for me at least, this quality inevitably collides with money energy. Abundance is inexplicably linked with generosity and require a particular mindset to master. The tricky thing about principles like abundance and generosity is that you can get stuck thinking these principles need to be present in your life at all times. Aligning with the cycles of life/nature/your menstrual cycle gives you permission to prioritize certain qualities over others at certain times of your life. Abundance and generosity take center stage during ovulation/Full Moon phase but you don’t need this energy during the New Moon/menstruation phase. You can have an abundant mindset and believe that the universe will provide for you and at the same time you can also believe that you need to rest and refuel every once in a while to sustain your abundant life. If you don’t stop to receive the support of the universe/your friends/family/village then you’ll never be able to continue giving.
Giving doesn’t exist in a vacuum just like yin doesn’t exist without yang. There has to be a balance and the balance to abundance and generosity is rest and receiving. You go out into the world and give what you have and then you go back inside yourself to regroup. It’s a tricky dance, but one worth learning.
Here are some reflection questions to help you embody generosity:
How are you feeling right now? Do you feel like you have energy to give?
How/what can you give to yourself?
What is one thing you can give to or share with others today?
Sexuality
I’ve never really written about or been comfortable speaking publicly (okay let’s be honest, even privately) about sexuality. But if there is one time of the month that sexuality is fair game it’s definitely during the Full Moon/ovulation phase of the cycle. I was on the Pill for most of my menstruating life until I wanted to get pregnant and I’m only now seeing in hindsight how much this impacted my own sexuality (it was massively inhibited). It’s obvious to me now when I’m ovulating because I’m more attuned to my natural sex drive. Although I was raised in a very modest, Midwestern household that exists on silence and does. not. talk. about anything “inappropriate,” I’m coming to understand this suppression of natural expression as a disservice to human, and specifically feminine, flourishing.
Think about it. As a society, we’ve collectively bought into the idea that sexuality is inappropriate. How can such a natural urge be inappropriate? Why should we have to suppress part of who we are, ever? I’ll tell you what I think. Because it makes men feel weak and they don’t like being reminded of that. Women have SO. MUCH. POWER. Especially when they understand how to brandish their most powerful tool—sexuality. And before you come at me with sexist comments about women being reduced to their bodies, I value intellect over all else. But the cold, hard fact of life is that women’s bodies are the vessel for the creation of life. So yes, women hold all the power because their bodies are literally the key to the continuance of the human race.
A woman attuned to and in control of her own sexuality renders most men basically helpless. Feeling helpless makes men feel weak. And because men don’t like weakness and we live in a patriarchal society, female sexuality, rather than embraced, has become a sin of our existence. Our entire social history has been built upon this idea that sexuality needs to be suppressed so that men can maintain control over women (and everything else). What if instead of women having to suppress their natural urges, men had to suppress theirs? Or better yet, what if everyone—every human—is expected to live by the same, equal standards?
My husband’s cousin practices Islam and wears a hijab and I’ve asked her before about her choice to do so. To her it’s a symbol of her choice to follow a spiritual path. One day while we were visiting her house for dinner, she took it off. It was the first time I had ever seen her hair. I asked her why she took it off and she explained that it’s okay to not wear it when you are amongst close family. She didn’t need to worry that her natural beauty would seduce her married male family members so she felt safe not wearing it in the comfort of her own home. But out in public, it’s always necessary. I admire her commitment to her faith and I really, really like her as a person. She’s an activist and a fabulous mother and a kind, fiery woman. But as I thought about this more I kept wondering why it’s the female’s responsibility to protect men from themselves? Why do women have to suppress their natural being but men don’t? And it’s not just in the Islamic traditions. Suppression of the feminine spirit is a societal norm everywhere you go, manifested in a million different ways.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting all women start walking around naked down the middle of the street while you’re ovulating or during the Full Moon. Rather, don’t be ashamed of your natural sex drive. Contemplate how you can best express your own feminine energy in productive, useful ways. Sex is an act of connection and creation. If you’re not in a situation where sex is desired or appropriate, how can you harness your energy to make meaningful connections or make space to create? I think women need to understand and embrace the energy of sexuality beyond the aesthetic. Beyond the body. Sexuality is also energetic and emotional and blissful. It’s an inner power and you get to choose how you manifest it outwardly. Don’t let society influence how you choose to wield your feminine power. Don’t be afraid to express your natural desires. Limit the suppression, favor the expression! Vive la revolution!
Here are some reflection questions to help you embody sexuality:
How do you experience your own sexuality? How does it make you feel?
What meaningful connections can you pursue when you feel energized?
What can you create that can help you productively express your own sexual energy?
Play
Finally, the principle of play. When was the last time you surrendered to play? I say surrender because in play, there is no judgment, no inner critic, no need to accomplish anything, no need for efficiency, no grades, reports, or deadlines. Play is pure joy.
There was a moment the other day when I was playing dinosaurs with my children and husband (a favorite after-dinner pastime in our household). Our son would tell us which dinosaur we were—it rotated between stegosaurus, pachycephalosaurus, T-Rex, and ankylosaurus (I have learned so much about dinosaurs since having kids…). Dad hid in the play fort and when the kids and I got too close he’d come out roaring, swiping at our feet until he could pull one of us into his lair and tickle us to pretend death. To evade the predator, the kids and I would run away down the hall. Being on all-fours (because I was a dinosaur), I found myself scampering away on three limbs because my daughter insisted on holding my hand and guiding me away from danger. It turns out it’s pretty challenging to hobble on all threes at the speed of a two-year-old running for her life away from predator Dad (sorry, ankylosuarus).
There was a moment as I was hobbling down the hallway carpet when I sank into the pure rapture of the moment. I was running as fast as I could on all threes, with feet and desperately clutching arms nipping at my toes, unaware of who was behind me, if I’d make it, or be captured. The sounds of laughter, joyous screams, and dinosaur roars filled the room.
“Mommy, get away.”
“Mommy, come here, I’ll save you.”
“Mommy, we’re safe.”
It’s not lost on me that my kids—at four and two—were saving me not just from predator (ankylosaurus) Dad, but also from the onslaught of the outside world. From all the judgments and self-judgment. From all the expectations and deadlines. They were also saving me from myself because I often am my own worst enemy when I’m not momentarily distracted by the joy of the present moment.
There is nothing more nourishing to the soul than play. If you don’t have kids or grandkids to play with, find moments to yourself or with your friends where you can immerse yourself in play for the sake of fun and presence. Disconnect from the adult world of responsibility and just be in the moment, free from judgement, free from deadlines, free from the need to be anything that you’re not or don’t want to be. Be a dinosaur. Be a princess. Be whatever you want to be and live it fully in that moment. Embrace spontaneity and imagination and you’ll find a wellspring of love and joy.
We took my kids to see their first movie in a theater recently and now the soundtrack of Wonka plays non-stop in our house.
“Come with me and you’ll be
In a world of pure imagination”
There couldn’t be a better theme song for the playful life. (And as a side note, listening to Timothee Chalamet isn’t so bad a punishment…but I digress 😂)
Fellow mama, truth-teller, introvert, writer, and firebrand in her own right Sarah Ezrin recently encouraged her followers to prioritize connections with fellow mothers. To stop hiding behind our kids, computers, and winter coats and just send that text to a fellow mom/friend inviting her for coffee. Yes, let’s do that, but also, maybe invite your friends to play, whatever that means to you. If you take your kids to the park, why not take yourself and your friends? Maybe your park is a wine bar or the coffee shop but maybe it’s the trampoline park or the laser tag place. However you want to do it, bring more play into your life and invite your female friends along with you! The Full Moon is the perfect monthly excuse for a mom’s night out.
Here are some reflection questions to help you embody play:
How does play make you feel?
What is your favorite form of play?
Can you pretend you’re in elementary school again and call up your friends to play? Why not?
Free Full Moon Yoga Class
Don't forget I’m teaching a Full Moon Yoga Class coming up on Thursday, January 27, 2024 from 7:30-8:30pm Eastern. This first Full Moon Yoga Class of the year is free. Register and get all the details here. We’ll practice squatting, kapalabhati breathing, and more!
Deep gratitude and thanks to the teachers, writers, and thinkers who inspired me in my thinking about this piece.
Uma Dinsmore Tulli and Sivani Mata of Well Woman: Yoni Shakti Yoga Therapy
Alexandra Pope and Sjani Hugo Wurlitzer of The Red School
Sarah Ezrin of
for her note about connecting with fellow mamas.Noha Beshir of
for her post on what it means to her to wear the hijabiKimia Dargahi and her post on
about Emily Ratajkowski, beauty, the body, and using feminine power.
Let’s connect
I would love to hear your thoughts. Here are some questions to discuss in the comments below:
Which of these qualities do you want to embrace more in your life?
Do you have an example of how you recently played, created, or shared?
How do you embrace your own feminine power?