Such an important transitional time for women! Thank you for drawing me back into the full body memory of this time AND how I had no idea how much the process was affecting EVERYTHING in my life.
Perimenopause wasn’t (in my mind) supposed to be THAT hard! As the transition to menopause- a wonderful state - I only felt the losses and the fear in that powerful and difficult time. A time of a disintegration of certain self definitions — monstrously powerful cultural messages!
I’m so happy that we women are beginning to honor - instead of fear- these processes. Yes! Actual wisdom. Yes, it is not a myth that one’s self appreciation increases dramatically and…yes, sexuality is better, richer and fuller than ever before.
I did NOT believe anyone about the beautiful potential for increased sexual intimacy that was coming with the culmination of menopause ! I genuinely thought the women who talked about it were not telling the full truth.
PS: Perimenopause is the hard part! Menopause is the freedom, the reward, and the opening to the deeper layers of conscious experiencing that we have so long craved.
Thank you so much for your honesty and for being one of our positive role models. Though I haven’t moved through this transition yet I sense that the spirituality and self-study that yoga invites us to marinate in are the true gifts this practice has to offer us in this transition.
Yes, Patty is indeed one of our wide role models. I am nearing that journey and feel the beginning of... something that is powerful and needs to be honored. Thank you for the reminder.
Oh, this is so interesting! Thank you for sharing. I have two older sisters that have been through menopause and I've been meaning to reach out to them and ask them how it has been for them. Unfortunately, I can no longer as my mom about her experience because she passed away last year, but she also never seemed to complain about any unpleasant symptoms. Of course, there's a whole world of women out there (like everyone contributing here) that can share their wisdom, as you just have!
Yes, asking family members how they experienced it is a great way to gain some insight too as it's often genetic. With that said, I'm a firm believer in yoga and health/fitness in general. I think consistent practice can help ease some of the symptoms even if you have genetic predisposition. Also, previous generations never talked about this stuff and had that tough-it-out mindset. It's hard not to have your mom but you can definitely gain some insight from your sisters!
I love this, "Practice ahimsa, compassion, by initiating self-love every day. Cultivate santosha, contentment, even on the days when you’re struggling. Moderate your energy (brahmacharya) by adjusting your practices based on how you’re feeling. Release your grasp on the past by letting go of the younger you and embracing the wise woman you are becoming (aparigraha). Surrender (ishvara pranidhana) to the universal wisdom of your female forebears. Be gentle with yourself as your body and life change."
Yes! I was going to same the same: this is such a beautifully condensed part of the post, where you weave the yamas and niyamas together in way that is so relevant to our lives!
This was beautiful and very inspiring Ashley. I have just turned 48 and feel stronger and better in my body than in a long time. The only symptom I’ve had so far was one missed period. I practice yoga daily (yes, EVERY day!), sometimes a more gentle practice, sometimes a more energetic practice. I meditate every day, begin my days with reading poetry (filling in my well, before I begin to give give give) and go for walks. The wonderful part about entering the wisdom phase is giving fewer fucks. For real. I am loving that finally people appreciate me for my brains and not my looks. And I am freer in my writing too!! This is to encourage you! :))
Love all of this Imola. Thanks so much for sharing your experience. All the fear-mongering normalizes this process as one to fear when in fact there are so many people, like you, who have positive experiences! And I'm positive the daily yoga practice doesn't hurt 🙂
Such an important topic… I’m 40 and feel like I’m on the cusp of peri menopause but I love how you frame it as entering the wisdom years. It definitely makes it feel more empowering in a culture that diminishes a woman as they age. Xx
This is such a vital post on our journey to making yoga relevant to women's experiences! That reminder that perimenopause is not a disease is so important. Just as pregnancy and birth get treated like diseases when they are over medicalized, we start to lose the soul in these experiences. I do like the idea of preparing before you reach perimenopause (am I perimenopausal at age 44? Maybe...maybe not. But that's why having this ongoing conversation is so important, because we all get there at some point). But yes, yoga is so much more powerful when we practice in the more peaceful or more balanced moments of our lives so that when the going gets rough, we have more automatic access to yogic tools and practices! Thanks for sharing this. It makes me feel less daunted about (peri)menopause.
So glad it made you feel less daunted about perimenopause and menopause! I get that the uncertainty of the journey is hard, but it's also what we're all here for—to support one another. What a wonderful time to come together and help one another out :)
Of the many transformations we are invited to go through as women — I found this to be one of the very most difficult. Perimenopause caught me by surprise. I wasn't planning a complete reorganization of self identity!
Obviously, our culture is still very hard on women. For me (and this is just me) I felt a profound dissolving into invisibility. I needed to reformulate — for myself — my usefulness and importance within my family, my work, and all that I expressed in every aspect of life. I was evolving and unfortunately, didn't at all realize what was going on. It all felt like loss...at first.
The most difficult part of it was that at the time I didn't know that this was an important developmental process and would bear so much delightful fruit in terms of vision, creativity and embodied wholeness. If I had known that perimenopause was such an important developmental process I wouldn't have resisted it so strongly and I'm sure it would have been an easier and perhaps joyful process of letting go and journeying into the new!
A door opens and we are asked to release what we hold in order to pass into the gifts of the new. Hmmm, something like birthing. Birthing hurts! But where would we be without it?
Thank you, Ashley for starting this conversation. 💖
What a beautiful description of your experience. Thanks so much for sharing! I always have to remind myself that growth doesn't happen without challenge and stress. My hope is that with some awareness moving into this transition I won't resist it so much, but I'm sure I will a little anyway. The transition into motherhood was surprisingly challenging for me so I'll be curious to see what perimenopause has in store in terms of identity shifting!
Such an important transitional time for women! Thank you for drawing me back into the full body memory of this time AND how I had no idea how much the process was affecting EVERYTHING in my life.
Perimenopause wasn’t (in my mind) supposed to be THAT hard! As the transition to menopause- a wonderful state - I only felt the losses and the fear in that powerful and difficult time. A time of a disintegration of certain self definitions — monstrously powerful cultural messages!
I’m so happy that we women are beginning to honor - instead of fear- these processes. Yes! Actual wisdom. Yes, it is not a myth that one’s self appreciation increases dramatically and…yes, sexuality is better, richer and fuller than ever before.
I did NOT believe anyone about the beautiful potential for increased sexual intimacy that was coming with the culmination of menopause ! I genuinely thought the women who talked about it were not telling the full truth.
PS: Perimenopause is the hard part! Menopause is the freedom, the reward, and the opening to the deeper layers of conscious experiencing that we have so long craved.
Thank you so much for your honesty and for being one of our positive role models. Though I haven’t moved through this transition yet I sense that the spirituality and self-study that yoga invites us to marinate in are the true gifts this practice has to offer us in this transition.
Yes, Patty is indeed one of our wide role models. I am nearing that journey and feel the beginning of... something that is powerful and needs to be honored. Thank you for the reminder.
Oh, this is so interesting! Thank you for sharing. I have two older sisters that have been through menopause and I've been meaning to reach out to them and ask them how it has been for them. Unfortunately, I can no longer as my mom about her experience because she passed away last year, but she also never seemed to complain about any unpleasant symptoms. Of course, there's a whole world of women out there (like everyone contributing here) that can share their wisdom, as you just have!
Yes, asking family members how they experienced it is a great way to gain some insight too as it's often genetic. With that said, I'm a firm believer in yoga and health/fitness in general. I think consistent practice can help ease some of the symptoms even if you have genetic predisposition. Also, previous generations never talked about this stuff and had that tough-it-out mindset. It's hard not to have your mom but you can definitely gain some insight from your sisters!
I love this, "Practice ahimsa, compassion, by initiating self-love every day. Cultivate santosha, contentment, even on the days when you’re struggling. Moderate your energy (brahmacharya) by adjusting your practices based on how you’re feeling. Release your grasp on the past by letting go of the younger you and embracing the wise woman you are becoming (aparigraha). Surrender (ishvara pranidhana) to the universal wisdom of your female forebears. Be gentle with yourself as your body and life change."
Thank you Corie! That’s what embodying yoga is all about to me 🙂
Yes! I was going to same the same: this is such a beautifully condensed part of the post, where you weave the yamas and niyamas together in way that is so relevant to our lives!
My specialty 😊
What a great speciality to have!
This was beautiful and very inspiring Ashley. I have just turned 48 and feel stronger and better in my body than in a long time. The only symptom I’ve had so far was one missed period. I practice yoga daily (yes, EVERY day!), sometimes a more gentle practice, sometimes a more energetic practice. I meditate every day, begin my days with reading poetry (filling in my well, before I begin to give give give) and go for walks. The wonderful part about entering the wisdom phase is giving fewer fucks. For real. I am loving that finally people appreciate me for my brains and not my looks. And I am freer in my writing too!! This is to encourage you! :))
Love all of this Imola. Thanks so much for sharing your experience. All the fear-mongering normalizes this process as one to fear when in fact there are so many people, like you, who have positive experiences! And I'm positive the daily yoga practice doesn't hurt 🙂
Such an important topic… I’m 40 and feel like I’m on the cusp of peri menopause but I love how you frame it as entering the wisdom years. It definitely makes it feel more empowering in a culture that diminishes a woman as they age. Xx
The day when women generally embrace aging as a form of power is the day the patriarchy falls!
This is such a vital post on our journey to making yoga relevant to women's experiences! That reminder that perimenopause is not a disease is so important. Just as pregnancy and birth get treated like diseases when they are over medicalized, we start to lose the soul in these experiences. I do like the idea of preparing before you reach perimenopause (am I perimenopausal at age 44? Maybe...maybe not. But that's why having this ongoing conversation is so important, because we all get there at some point). But yes, yoga is so much more powerful when we practice in the more peaceful or more balanced moments of our lives so that when the going gets rough, we have more automatic access to yogic tools and practices! Thanks for sharing this. It makes me feel less daunted about (peri)menopause.
So glad it made you feel less daunted about perimenopause and menopause! I get that the uncertainty of the journey is hard, but it's also what we're all here for—to support one another. What a wonderful time to come together and help one another out :)
Of the many transformations we are invited to go through as women — I found this to be one of the very most difficult. Perimenopause caught me by surprise. I wasn't planning a complete reorganization of self identity!
Obviously, our culture is still very hard on women. For me (and this is just me) I felt a profound dissolving into invisibility. I needed to reformulate — for myself — my usefulness and importance within my family, my work, and all that I expressed in every aspect of life. I was evolving and unfortunately, didn't at all realize what was going on. It all felt like loss...at first.
The most difficult part of it was that at the time I didn't know that this was an important developmental process and would bear so much delightful fruit in terms of vision, creativity and embodied wholeness. If I had known that perimenopause was such an important developmental process I wouldn't have resisted it so strongly and I'm sure it would have been an easier and perhaps joyful process of letting go and journeying into the new!
A door opens and we are asked to release what we hold in order to pass into the gifts of the new. Hmmm, something like birthing. Birthing hurts! But where would we be without it?
Thank you, Ashley for starting this conversation. 💖
What a beautiful description of your experience. Thanks so much for sharing! I always have to remind myself that growth doesn't happen without challenge and stress. My hope is that with some awareness moving into this transition I won't resist it so much, but I'm sure I will a little anyway. The transition into motherhood was surprisingly challenging for me so I'll be curious to see what perimenopause has in store in terms of identity shifting!